Answers to Prayer
I have been missing my mom. I don't think it is because of Christmas. Sadly, I have spent one Christmas with her since I got married 21 years ago, so I'm not used to being together for the holidays. Maybe it's because I'm sad that now I never will. Maybe I am sad that the last Christmas I spent with her, when my now eighteen year old was born, was my last and I didn't know. Maybe it is because I regret not going out there for Christmas. Maybe it is because I am watching my dad's heart break again and again each holiday and each major family event that he experiences without her. Maybe it because I see my sisters going through the same thing I am and not really knowing how to help them. This is all just so hard.
Yesterday, as I prepared for my weekly temple worship, I prayed that I would feel my mom in the temple, that she would be with me. My husband wasn't feeling well, so I took my oldest son. He performed baptisms for the dead. Through a series of events, I ended up participating in sealings for families who had not had the opportunity to be sealed together for time and all eternity during their lives on earth. A couple knelt across an altar from one another, holding hands. I knelt to their side and put my hand on theirs. They were acting as the parents. I was acting as their daughter. I was overwhelmed by the experience. The way the Lord chose to answer my prayer was to remind me of the Priesthood power which sealed my family together long ago. He reminded me of the covenants made and the blessings promised. He reminded me of the eternal nature of families. Equally tender was the privilege of helping other daughters to be reunited with their mothers and fathers, whom they love. I felt a kinship with these daughters. I understood at least one thing about them: they were separated from their parents. Simultaneously, my heart ached for them and rejoiced for them. I rejoiced that they can now be with their families forever!
I remember hearing someone say, "The Lord is so efficient!" I have thought a lot about that over the years. He is efficient! Rather than answering my prayer with a feeling, which would have been lovely, He answered it with a feeling, a renewed and strengthened testimony and faith in temple ordinances and covenants, and an offer of those same blessings to other daughters. As always, He gave me so much more than I asked for.
Yesterday, as I prepared for my weekly temple worship, I prayed that I would feel my mom in the temple, that she would be with me. My husband wasn't feeling well, so I took my oldest son. He performed baptisms for the dead. Through a series of events, I ended up participating in sealings for families who had not had the opportunity to be sealed together for time and all eternity during their lives on earth. A couple knelt across an altar from one another, holding hands. I knelt to their side and put my hand on theirs. They were acting as the parents. I was acting as their daughter. I was overwhelmed by the experience. The way the Lord chose to answer my prayer was to remind me of the Priesthood power which sealed my family together long ago. He reminded me of the covenants made and the blessings promised. He reminded me of the eternal nature of families. Equally tender was the privilege of helping other daughters to be reunited with their mothers and fathers, whom they love. I felt a kinship with these daughters. I understood at least one thing about them: they were separated from their parents. Simultaneously, my heart ached for them and rejoiced for them. I rejoiced that they can now be with their families forever!
I remember hearing someone say, "The Lord is so efficient!" I have thought a lot about that over the years. He is efficient! Rather than answering my prayer with a feeling, which would have been lovely, He answered it with a feeling, a renewed and strengthened testimony and faith in temple ordinances and covenants, and an offer of those same blessings to other daughters. As always, He gave me so much more than I asked for.
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